Sunday, July 15, 2007

letter from an asshole.

yeah, well I'm fed up with you and this. you're wasting your time and I'm angry at you for it. Heartbreak will kill you if you let it, and fuck if you're not giving any effort to be alright. I can't deal with you and that's probably why I did it in the first place. It's not a lack of understanding, it's more of a meaningless bubble you put me in. Well you're done with me now it seems and I'm glad for it. Shoot me for being an asshole, but if that's what this is, I've always been one my whole life. I'm cracking my knuckles, getting ready to punch your lights out, but your indifference to even this only puts fuel in the fire. take some fucking medicine and feel better, just make an effort to get out of this, or I'm just going to give up on you. Stop dwelling in it because it's not the end of the world.
You will never know how mad you make me. Stop fucking with your own emotions and smother yourself with what you've been using on me. And go jump off those bridges I was warned so helpfully not to burn. "I said I loved you but I lied."

in other sorts of news. in and out of hotels and states in the last two weeks. my bed never felt so comfortable. shopping for a new identity in fashion magazines and movie theatres. I miss three years ago. And I am forever angry at you for changing.
nothing is better than red notebooks, hoodies and sheets. the fatal combination that makes up most of my life. (And I don't even care if I got most of these words from you).

for the record, your sadness has lost its meaning in translation to me. I am sick of all the adolescent relationships around me breaking at the seams.